I have had a writing hiatus. It has been longer than I would have hoped.
Sometimes there are journeys we go through that are meant to be written about and processed and understood. Some journeys we just don’t understand. Not now, maybe not ever. And most journeys that we don’t understand now– God eventually sheds light – well, let me say, the light is always there, but WE eventually are able to open our eyes to His view and see it. Then we have a fresh look and an “ah ha!” moment. I am in the process of several journeys– of course-we all are. Some required a little break from my blogging.
Today, a friend shared with me Ecclesiastes 3. “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens…”
In reference to my journey, this verse really hit me.
This is one of those verses, that we have heard before. Sometimes these well known verses can start — and then — we kind of fill in the rest of the verse with “Blah, blah, blah…yeah I know that one…heard it before” kind of an attitude. (Well at least that is how it goes for me…haha) But today, I decided to go back and read through it with fresh eyes. I was determined to read it with intention and application.
There is a season in my life that is changing. A time for something that was so clearly from God and was definitely His unique call on my life, and now…He isn’t calling me to that thing anymore. Or perhaps, He is, but in a very different way.
And with a change like this, there is death. Death of a dream, or a relationship, or a purpose. And death has a sting. Death hurts and it wasn’t woven into me at creation. It wasn’t God’s intention in Eden. His intention was eternal relationship with Him.
And so, quite frankly, death of anything hurts. It sucks.
But there is a time for everything.
So…on the heels of death in some particular areas of my life, I have been mourning. I have been fighting death and wishing for another plan. Digging my own heels in. Tears have been shed. Words have been thrown. And I have wanted the ending that I hoped for.
But, there is a time for everything….
And God used this verse to show me, that there is a time and a purpose in even these things. My things. A time in my own life. Specifically it says: “Time to die, a time to uproot, a time to tear down, and to weep and mourn…
to scatter stones…
to refrain from embracing…
to give up….
to throw away…..”
Yes really the Bible does say these things. And God really does care about these things.
Today, there is still the sting of death in some areas of my life. God is teaching me through these things.
I look out the window, and death is coming to life. It is spring. Everything that died is coming back to life. My annual flowers, and my garden vegetables, and even the tray that I left out all winter…it died and was warped, and the perennials whose fresh flowers became dry sticks…the leaves that fell off of the trees…they all died. But life is stirring, and there is an abundance of green. The sun is peeking out, and the rain is hydrating. And color is beginning to peek through…
And so there is also “a time to be born, and a time to plant.
A time to heal and a time to build.
A time to dance and a time to embrace, and a time to keep.
A time to mend.”
To my soul today, this is something of value. Something I can hope in and that I give to God. He is a God of resurrection (as I celebrated yesterday for Easter). He is a good God who gives us His best, even when we don’t get it. When we cry and struggle.
So I will rest in this today:
“He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity on the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” And then Solomon says “I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink and find satisfaction in all their toil-this is the gift of God” Ecclesiastes 3: 11-13
So, I look to find satisfaction in my toil and I definitely consider it a gift of God.